VMA Post-Mortem

I had no intention of writing anything about tonight's Video Music Awards (aside from the squibs over at TVLatest), but the show has been over for twenty minutes and I find myself jittery, on edge, and feeling kind of angry and I have no idea why.

I think part of the problem is that my intent for watching was not coming from a positive place. Being in Detroit for the majority of the last year has left me fairly unexposed to popular music. When the radio stations play only that one Eminem song, that one Usher song, "Rolling in the Deep" and "E.T.", you're left in the boonies in terms of what other people are listening to. You used to be able to find out what those songs could be by tuning into MTV, but as the students who are arriving on-campus Tuesday will tell you, that has not been the case in their lifetimes.

I'll let that sink in before moving on.

Also, as is the case with any major event of this sort, Twitter scrolls along in the background. What I love about Twitter is getting to share in cultural moments with people who are on the same wavelength as me. Unfortunately, that wavelength includes competitive bitchery, which is in full force for the VMAs. The only moments that I think were universally enjoyed ("universally" being defined as 65% approval or better) was Adele's performance and Beyoncé's baby bump. Even the Amy Winehouse tribute (which I thought was classy given that Russell Brand was the main spokesperson) received a heavy dose of heckling from my follow list.

I guess what bothers me is that tonight's show was like watching a dream unfulfilled. When I was born my six siblings ranged in age from 5-17 and just about all of them wanted their MTV. Throughout my toddlerdom I received Chernobyl-like exposure to music presented in the video format. Now you know why I am the way I am. Anyway, I wanted to make music videos when I grew up, but when the programming model of MTV and VH1 shifted in the mid-90's there was a supply/demand issue arising. MTV2 came along and I would watch that for hours on end during my high school years. Then that programming model changed and now that dream felt all but dead.

Maybe this is a long-winded way of saying "I'm old! They don't play music on MTV anymore! GET OFF MY LAWN!" Maybe that's what's bumming me out.

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Chatterbox

Every Tuesday afternoon the bowling center I work at hosts a local senior bowling league. It's a program that works in conjunction with the town Senior Center and each month they produce a newsletter/booklet called The Chatterbox. It contains a listing of upcoming events for the month, a holiday related recipe or two, a "poem" (or whatever you call rhyming couplets based around banality) and requests for volunteers and donations. I'll usually skim through to see what sort of stuff is happening around town and see if there is anything worth passing to Passive Aggressive Notes or the FailBlog. Here is an excerpt from the newest issue:

IMPORTANT NOTICE:

It is with great regret and sorrow that Ruth and I have decided, due to massive cut backs in spending that we are no longer going to be able to publish the Chatter Box after this publication. We in the past have been running off 650 copies of each page to distribute to the general public in different public areas, hospitals, Dr. offices, living facilities. Our normal publication has at least 9 pages of information and 1 calendar page. That comes to a total of 6,500 pages for each month. The cost of ink has risen too as well as the price of paper. Not only does the increase cost affect us be we too are considering the effect on the environment by cutting so much of our tree population to produce the paper. We as a Senior Center must contribute to saving our planet. It seems like such a small sacrifice to make. I know that some of you will be upset with this news, but all we can say to you is: APRIL FOOLS!

What I like about this is the conversation I'm imagining took place as the author(s) were writing up this joke.

Ruth: Ooo, put in that part about saving trees
Not-Ruth: Yeah! That's a great touch! That'll really make the sale!
Ruth: Hey, wanna hop in my Hummer and knock down trees in the Arb after we print these babies?

I know that conversation didn't take place, but I think it makes their little joke that much more enjoyable.

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